Dos and Do-Not’s of Wedding Guest Lists and Invites

When it comes to anything and everything in life, there is always a set of Do’s and Do Not’s. Here is a list of some Do’s and Do Not’s when it comes to your Hawaii Wedding Guest List & Invites…
1. Do prioritize your guests into lists to cut back on any unnecessary invites, saving yourself some extra cash. Check out our previous blog: “Your Guest List, Easy as ABC”.
2. Do Not feel obligated to give your “single” friends a plus 1 invite. Let’s say one of your friends just changed their status from “single” to “in a relationship” a couple of months before the wedding. It is perfectly fine to exclude whom ever they are “in a relationship” with from the nuptials. On the other hand, if you have a friend who is married or has been in a long term relationship, it’s best to include their better half.
3. Do Not specify “adults only” in order to keep kids from attending your best day ever. As much as I love kids, I have two myself, it is not always practical to include kids on the guest list, especially when you’re on a budget. Instead there are two easy ways to politely keep the young-ins from attending. The first would be to address the invitation to the parents only, for example, Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. Typically to include the kids or invite the whole family, one would address the invite as “Mr. and Mrs. John Smith” or simply “Smith family”.
Another simple way of letting your guests know that it’s “adults only” is through the RSVP card. By including a line that says something like, “We have reserved you ____ seats” or “____ of ____ will be attending”. In both cases you fill in the blanks with how many are invited. In the latter, your guest is to fill out the first blank.
4. Do Not hand out invitations with past RSVP dates. Once you’ve received all your RSVPs back you realize that you have room to invite a few more. Make certain that you do not include an RSVP card that’s past it’s date. Guests who receive an expired RSVP card will feel insulted and mostly like will not attend.
wedding invitations, hand painted, hand painted wedding invitations

Hawaii Wedding Invitation Sample

5. Do make certain you have adequate postage on your invites. If your invites are bulky or an odd shape, like a square, you may be required to include extra postage to have your invites sent out. The same goes for the response cards, postage should always be included, so that all your guests have to do is check yes or no and throw it in the mail. Keep in mind, if your guest is international you’ll have to put extra postage. Information on how much postage is needed can be found online at or better yet, bring your invites to your nearest local post office.

6. Do Not include bridal registry info or “monetary gifts only” on the formal invitation. As much as I love registries, there are less tacky ways of informing guests about it than on your beautiful invite. Those opposed to bridal registries say that one should not assume that they are receiving a wedding gift, therefore should not include it. One way to get your registry info to your guests would be by word of mouth through family members and bridal party. Second, post the information on your wedding website. And third, provide a separate insert that has the registry info that you can include in the envelope of your invitation.
For more on invitation etiquette, check out Emily Post. We hope we helped you clear up some confusion on wedding guest invite etiquette. And as always, if you have questions, we’d love to help answer them. Comment us here or contact your Hawaii Wedding Planners today.



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